The mind is a funny thing. I have recently recognized the influence positive thoughts have on our lives. I relate it to working out. Sometimes the process sucks but the results are always good. Replacing positive thoughts with negative thoughts is a workout for your mind and spirit. Lately, I've been much better with my mental workout. (I need to get to the gym...)
Usually I spend a week or so spending time chewing on a concept until I feel resolved. This week I'm thinking of positive thoughts and the power they have. I realize some of this may sound cheesy to some people, but I'm going to share it with the readers out there because of how much it has helped me and continues to help me. For so long I felt ashamed about my inner struggle I went through but I am proud of the steps I took to change.
I've always been a positive person on the outside. Happy to see friends, enjoy the small things in life, and just all around jovial. However, for most of my life I struggled with positive thoughts about myself. I suffered from poor self image, low self esteem, and very little self worth. Fortunately, I have always had strong morals that kept me from being self destructive. But it did effect the relationships I had with myself and, in turn, other people.
This growth I experienced started about 4 years ago when I realized how unhappy I was with my life. I made a lot of changes back then...to include loosing a lot of weight, finishing my bachelor's degree, and ending a long term relationship that wasn't healthy for me. None of those were easy things and thought I got the hard part over with.
But the hard part had just begun, internally. I still fought with my lack of self worth. I'm not even sure I knew what it meant up until a couple years ago. Now, 4 years later, I have a sense of self worth and a high self esteem. And I think that I can contribute it to so many things, but I think that there are some things that I always have to practice to keep in mental shape.
Reading: The first thing that helped me was the amount of reading I did. I read about every relevant self help book. I didn't read them for the authors to tell me what to think; I read them because they got me to think and reflect about me. The focus was finally on me, and not someone else. I don't read as many self help books today, but find the same reflection can be found in poetry or other books.
My mantra: I have admitted to this only to a few people, but for over a year - I got in front of the mirror every morning and would look myself in the eyes and say aloud, "You deserve the best. The best friendships, the best love, and the best sex. You are worth it". I even had it printed and posted on my mirror. (Just a side note: I didn't go out and have sex with people. In fact, quite the opposite. It was something to represent the combination of friendship and love.)
Gratitude and positive imaging: This is something that I continue to exercise because of the amazing effects it has on my positive mental state. Each night before I go to sleep I think of 5 things in which I feel grateful. This could be anything from the wonderful date I had, to the warm weather outside. Sometimes I write these things out, other times I think of it in my head. But it always carries over to the next day.
I imagine positive things in my mind and believe the results will happen. For example, I thought every night for the past couple months that my step dad and mom would be okay (health things going on) and that I would meet someone that made me happy. These were things I said over to myself each night before going to bed. Not only did I say them to myself, I went though my next day believing they had already happened. This is something that is suggested in books such as "The Secret". It's positive affirmations and I am certain it works. It doesn't mean that all your wishes come true...but it keeps you in a positive mental state. This positive state helps you deal with the curve balls that life can throw at us. (P.S - Those positive thoughts - they came true - both of them!)
These are just some of the ways I try to 'stay in shape' mentally. I know that when I get off track, just like my thighs get wider after not using the treadmill, I need to revisit what makes me strong and healthy. And always remember what has gotten me where I am today.
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